Oh dear, I’m screwed.

I’m going to buy a blood pressure machine. Thoughts or recommendations?

So the knee thing is done. Went in Tuesday morning, home by one. Don’t remember much from the afternoon. Slept till 10ish this morning. I was pretty excited that things didn’t hurt yesterday afternoon. That was before I realized that Wednesday would be a day of misery and pain. I know that it really is painful when taking a oxycodone doesn’t really do much for the pain. Makes it hard to type, that’s for sure!
Here’s a before and after picture! I don’t know what all that is, but the goopy stuff on the left picture evidently isn’t good.

I’m really bored, though. Sat and watched the birds for a while today. I don’t know if that’s because I was high, or because I liked watching them. Redpolls are mean to each other.
Going back to work tmmrw to sit in my recliner with my laptop. Hopefully I’ll be able to drive; that might be the challenge of the day……Luckily, there’s only one light and two stop signs between my house and the office.

So, this whole falling down thing is getting a little OLD.

Fell as I was getting out of my truck at the grocery store on Saturday.

Just fell down between my bed and the bathroom and smacked the hell out of my face. Sitting here with ice on my head.

It’s not a traction thing, it’s not a passing out thing, it’s not a I’m-drunk-and-passing-out thing, it’s not a being dizzy thing, it’s not a knee thing. It’s a muscular thing. It’s as if my legs just can’t support my weight, or that I just lose control of my quads and hamstrings all at the same time and I end up like a pile of jello on the floor. The disconcerting thing is that now that it’s happened a couple (like 5) times, I know when it’s going to happen….and I still can’t do anything about it but hold on for the ride.

Ugh. I joke about being a ‘tard, but, seriously, what.the.fuck.

It was Chicken Rustico. Evidently Marsella is something different.

This is why I’m not allowed out alone.

This is what I’m eating right now. Chicken Marsalla, from Gamberdellas. Yes, Andy, I know you hate this place.

But Dayna works here, and has been asking me if I was ever going to come and eat here. Tonight I finally did.

This is what she suggested:

1. Custom flite of wine. 3 reds.
2. This chicken marsalla. Ohh. Emm. Gee. Pollenta. Chicken. Mushrooms. Sausage. Peppercinis. Red sauce.

Andy, we should come here when Dayna is working. I’ll buy. It just might change your opinion.

I just told Dayna that it was so good that I could decided if I wanted to write about it or eat it.

But on second thought?
Screw y’all. I’m eating.

So I fell down the stairs at work today. I don’t know what happened–I was walking along, not really holding on to the handrail, and the next thing I knew, I was on my back staring at the ceiling.
I don’t think anybody saw, or heard, me go down. Not that I care that much if people know, obviously.
Then I came home, got out of the truck, and proceeded to do a complete faceplant into the snow.
So I’m laying there, half wondering what the hell is going on with my legs, half laughing at myself, and then I thought:

This has to stop, or I’m going to have to get one of those retard helmets to wear around.

So this comment won’t be as nerdy as the last one I made.

This guy in Salt Lake wrote a craigslist posting about his experience in buying girls drinks. I completely agree with him. That said, the last girl I bought a drink for turned out to be an amazing woman. That doesn’t, however, negate the previous times wherein I’ve been taken in by the low-cut shirt and tight pants, worn only to get a free drink out of me, only to get the chest-pat walk away without a word dismissal. Fuck, I sound like a crusty curmudgeon, don’t I? Perhaps that’s where I’m headed. Dunno…

Regardless, that time is done. Forevernomore will I be suckered by the evilness that is buying women drinks. (The seventeen single women in Fairbanks take note!! Not that any of you really seem to care, seeing as how this town is a target rich environment in which you can spend a night out and not spend a dime…..) Perhaps this will destine me to be single, but honestly, I’d rather be single than to be used. I suck at dating as it is and always have. I don’t need your narcissistic bitchy selves further eroding whatever meager self-confidence I have remaining by luring me in and leading me on with your empty promises.

Anyway, dude may have only been 22, but he’s wise beyond his years.

Right. This would only slightly suck.

I, like most people that find TPS Reports (and their cover sheets) funny, sometimes rely on the humor contained in Office Space to get my through a day.

It’s a good thing today is Friday. Seriously.

“…..And I said, I don’t care if they lay me off either, because I told, I told Bill that if they move my desk one more time, then, then I’m, I’m quitting, I’m going to quit. And, and I told Don too, because they’ve moved my desk four times already this year, and I used to be over by the window, and I could see the squirrels, and they were married, but then, they switched from the Swingline to the Boston stapler, but I kept my Swingline stapler because it didn’t bind up as much, and I kept the staples for the Swingline stapler and it’s not okay because if they take my stapler then I’ll set the building on fire…”

Today at work I had to fill out a form
that requests access to a form
that allows me access to a web page
that allows me to submit a report
………………………………………………that nobody will ever read.

There’s a point, I promise.

The thing I like about Frank Drake is that he’s right, he knows it, and is very humble about it. Sure, the variables have changed over time with more and more research, but it’s generally accepted (by everybody expect for the whackjob Tipler) that the the result of the Drake Equation has always been greater than one at any given point.

I did some research with f_c, with a specific concentration on parts of the Fermi Paradox (It didn’t work out, I was totally incorrect, and we don’t talk about this), so this whole idea hits pretty close to home. It’s pretty easy to analyze your world when you tear it down to contributing factors. Literally. But the hard part isn’t defining the variables, it’s trying to figure out the value of the variables. 

So, why bother, right?  But here’s where Drake, Fermi and I disagree.  In the mid 20th century, when Drake and Fermi were looking to answer these questions and spark discussion, nobody was really thinking about how space and time are related, or really, what space and time looked like. Time went one way, space went three ways, and that was that. Plain and simple. But that’s not really how things are put together.

Basically, they were thinking in a straight line, when in fact, gravity’s a bitch, and time and space are altered by something existing.

Or, also, even not existing.

My point, as promised, is that this document needs to be edited for Fairbanks, Alaska.

During Christmas break, my friend recently gave me a hard time about not posting.

So, here’s a post. My left knee is fucked. I mentioned this last spring, but it’s just gotten a lot worse over the last 6 months or so. Bad enough, in fact, that I went to the doctor. Said doctor sent me to have an MRI. MRI results said a lot of things, but the ones that bugged me the most where these:

• Multiple severe degenerative signals in the posterior horn of the medial meniscus with readily identifiable surface reaching tears.
• Severe thinning of the articular cartilage in the inferolateral patellar facet.
• Moderate lateral pretibial soft tissue swelling is evident.

I may not know what that means medically, but I know what it means in reality—that when I walk, my knee hurts. A lot. Debilitating, crippling, I’d-rather-crawl-than-walk, level 9, pure pain. They want to go in and cut my knee open and “…trim…” some of my meniscus out. Ouch!

There’s just two rather large problems with that. First, The posterior horn is hard to reach because the bones of femur and tibia are in the way. Secondly, it doesn’t _really_ hurt when I ride. It can get uncomfortable, sure, but it’s not that bad……..and I hate doctors.

For the longest time after my motorcycle accident, I had issues with doctors. I still get a little queasy when walking into a hospital. My hand was one thing—I didn’t have a choice there at all–it was essentially a pile of fleshy-jello. But this is different. I can still function. Sort of. And like I said, it doesn’t bother me on the bike that much….. Ugh.
It’s not that I dislike my doctor, or that I don’t trust that this needs to be done. I’ve known since 2001 that my knee was fucked and needed work. I mean, like, a truck landed on me, fer chrissake. I’ve just been hoping that it’d get better. Magically! That’s not working.

So after the MRI, I had surgery scheduled here in Fairbanks for a week from now. I called and canceled it. I know it seems like it’s something simple and that I’m just bitching, but honestly, I’m just fucking scared to have somebody cut me open. Also, this will put me on my ass for a while, and I’m not really in a position for that.

Second opinion time, methinks.

(A) You people are fucking crazy.
(B) Take a larger dose of lithium next time.
(C) Choose someone _sane_ as your spokesperson next time.

So, for those of you that don’t keep up:

There are whackjobs out there that either don’t like the fact that Obama’s black, that his middle name isn’t “Robert”, that he’s not a stupid cunt named “Sarah”, or that he’s a democrat.

Whatever–these people have a name now, other than whackjob–”Birthers”. Ugh. So the dumbshit in the video above came out with this birth certificate that says that Obama was born in Kenya. Ugh. It got press, but it was press of the “Hey, look at this crazy bitch!” type.
For obvious reasons, I think.

I dunno about you, but if you want something investigated, send it to the press. Seriously. There’s nothing that the press does that’s worth much of anything, but those fuckers know how to find out if you’re telling the truth or not. So come to find out, this crazy bitch from above copied the stuff from, get this—an AUSTRALIAN—birth certificate and changed key elements, say, like the name. But it doesn’t take much to find out that it’s a fake……Ugh. Ugh. Ugh.

This video sums a lot of things up, The commentator calls the whackjob bitch by the wrong name. Hilarious. Best laugh I’ve had in quite some time.

(Edit: OH MY FUCKING GOD, I would _pay_ to be this entertained.)

I forgot to post a message here after I uploaded these.

http://80below.com/gallery/v/bike_stuff/2009Fireweed200/

So there it is.
Yellow is power, blue is speed, red is heart rate. 10 minute smoothing.

I’m very happy with my results. 11:28 is 22 minutes faster than last year.

                            2008         2009
First 15 miles:    0:49          0:53 (4 mins slower in 2009)
First 75 miles:    3:48          3:49 (1 min slower in 2009)
First 100 miles:   5:20          5:11 (9 mins faster in 2009)
First 125 miles:   7:00          6:47 (13 mins faster in 2009)
First 140 miles:   7:55          7:32 (23 mins faster in 2009)
First 163.75 miles: 10:16         9:52  (24 mins faster in 2009)
Finish (192 miles): 11:50         11:28 (22 mins faster in 2009)

The headwind in Keystone Canyon was pretty killer, as were the winds before Thompson Pass. Jeff said they were the worst he’d raced in all of the times he’s gone to Valdez.
Regardless, let’s suffice to say that I pretty much kicked ass and I’m happy with my results.

Entire workout (137 watts):
Duration:  	11:27:45 (11:31:12)
Work:      	5656 kJ
TSS:       	482.8 (intensity factor 0.649)
Norm Power:	153
VI:        	1.11
Pw:HR:      	16.13%
Pa:HR:      	11.56%
Distance:  	193.571 mi
       	        Min	Max	Avg
Power:       	0	510	137 	watts
Heart Rate:  	61	172	147 	bpm
Cadence:     	30	231	73 	rpm
Speed:       	2.2	46.2	16.9 	mph
Pace         	1:18	26:49	3:33 	min/mi
Crank Torque:	0	827	162 	lb-in

You twitter folk have said you were expecting more updates–I should have appointed one of you to call and check in with the crew to post updates. Lesson learned, will do that next year!

So my “A” race of the year is the Fireweed 200. It’s a bike race for 200 miles (192…) across Alaska.

By my count, there are 29 men entered in the Solo 200 category this year. Impressive.

Anyhow, here’s an update on my training.

TSB/ATL/CTL graph for Mid-June. A little less than a month to go until my “A” race of the year, the Fireweed 200–a 200 mile solo TT across Alaska.

This also explains the lack of posts lately. I spend most of my free time on the bike.

I’m not the only one!  I welcome your thoughts and comments on this essay written by Penn Jillette.

That said, I suppose I should mention that I have no problem with a sense of community, a need for people to belong.  I really don’t even have an issue if you’ve never sat down and thought about why you believe what you believe.  If you have a void of the unknown that needs to be filled with something, that’s all well and good. More power to you. You can believe in your god, that’s all well and good.  But why are you angry and upset that I don’t?

I don’t believe in the tooth fairy, either, but I don’t see people getting their panties in a knot over that issue!  What’s the difference?  For every logical, rational argument that you can present for the existence of your god, I can use the same EXACT justification for the existence of the tooth fairy.

So, April in Alaska is much like March in the rest of the Northern Hemisphere, at least when it comes to cycling weather.

So this has been my first 5 weeks of riding outside, following the training plan, and really doing all the things I know that I need to do.

Seriously, there’s nothing I’d rather do on my birthday than enjoy 70*F temps, bright blue skies, sunshine, and a couple hours on the bike.  I left the house, warmed up for a bit, then climbed up the second half Cripple Creek Hill at 230w for 10 minutes, stopped at the Parks Highway Monument for about a half hour and took this pictures of the bike, enjoyed the view, then took The Old Nenana back home. Then came home and ate a pizza.

I’m 37 years old today and I’m really, really happy.

More from the Christian-right that seem to have taken over my family. I know that a lot of you will find this offensive, shocking, or whatever. It’s not my intention to deliberately offend you. I will, however, try to invoke an emotional response in order to force you to think…. and thus challenge you to defend your opinion.

This might make more sense if you read this before reading the rest of the following:

——————————————————————————————————————————————

On Thu, Apr 23, 2009 at 4:23 PM, Barbara Herman <barb.herman@mbarqmail.com> wrote:
> For those of you following this email, Ken is my nephew who resides in
> Alaska. I Bcc those names that I sent it to originally and I will do that
> from now on. However this could be an  interesting forum of opinions. If not
> interested please delete it.

….and in doing so, pretty much ended the discussion, as well as eliminated people’s right to opt out of the discussion.  Hard to remove someone from a “Reply All” list when they are blind copied.

Very good way to get the last word, I’d say!

Anyway, I chose to add (name removed), as he took the time to (somewhat) offer his thoughts, thereby expressing some interest.

> I am a little surprised you would take this opportunity to discuss your
> political views and opinions on the “The Pledge of Allegiance”, however
> since you opened up an opportunity to discuss it let me give you my opinion.

Why would you be surprised?
You sent out inane statements that infer that “we” all agree, when in fact “we” don’t agree on much of anything at all.
Least of all, we don’t agree upon religion or what it means to be a patriot.

> “If you’re one of those crazy right-wing, bible thumping,
> brainwashed-by-Rush-Limbaugh people who thinks the planet is 6000
> years old, be forewarned that you’re probably not going to agree….”
>
> You may have insulted a lot of people who may hold those typical
> fundamentalist viewpoints. What right do you give yourself to do that?
>  Wouldn’t that be considered a very ego-centric attitude?

Insulted?  That’s a shame, for holding an opinion comes with the responsibility of defending that opinion, rather than just saying “this is what I believe because this is what I believe because this is what I was told.”  Regardless, I believe that stating an opinion shouldn’t be muted for fear of offending someone.  If I voice my opinion and if offends you, let’s discuss why it offended you. Perhaps we’ll both learn something from being offended–if not about the subject of what we’re discussing, then about ourselves, or our belief structures.
Are the belief structures of the general population so weak as to take offense and then crumble at the mere mention of the opinion of another?

You say those views are “typical”, which I find to be very disturbing.
For instance, science and math prove the earth to be 4.56 Billion years old.  Not 6000.  That’s easily proven by fission track geocronology.  But, whatever, if you want to believe the earth is 6000 years old because you read it in a novel called “The Bible”, then sure, go right ahead.  Also feel free to tell the grocery store that you only owe them $3.22 for a weeks’ worth of groceries.  (Oh, yeah, your god didn’t write your novel, by the way.  A bunch of upper crust men, in an attempt to retain their power and money, most importantly, control over the masses, did….)

> I think that our God is A God of Many People, many religions, and all
> nations. However this is our United States Pledge.  We are one nation under
> God, and we will stand indivisible.

No, “we” are most definitely not one nation under your “god”.
We are a nation that believes a great many different things. This is the principle that our Puritan founding fathers, fleeing religious persecution, founded our nation upon.  The right to religious freedom, including the freedom to not practice religion or pledge to any god.

>  I don’t believe it states that everyone
> in this country must hold the Judeo-Christian beliefs. Why would anyone have

You think that because you didn’t understand what I wrote, didn’t like what I wrote, and can’t (or won’t) challenge your worldview.
I’ll quote from what I wrote before:  “de facto monotheism”

> problems reciting those words, unless they are an atheist? And perhaps that
> is the true issue here.

An atheist, or a Buddhist, a Muslim, a Hindi, a Shinto, a Jain, or a Sikh?
None of those people believe in your god.
That’s a scant step away from the thought “They have dark skin and don’t believe in God, so surely they’re a terrorist out to blow something up!!”

And what is the “true issue” with atheism?  Atheism does not make an individual less than someone who believes in god.  Would you take away their right to their beliefs because they are not aligned with your own?  Is this an issue of fear of the unknown, discomfort with anyone who does not believe in miracles, talking snakes and bushes, and immaculate conception?

> Our Country was founded on spiritual values and a belief system that there
> was a higher power above all. Our fore fathers believed in something called
> “faith” and they relied on that faith to make decisions for this great
> country we live in. As President Eisenhower wrote:

That mistaken belief is a product of your education.  That’s not your fault, it’s a matter of you believing the things you were told and not questioning them after the fact.  So, research it a little bit.

The fact is, some of the 1787 delegates had no religious affiliation. Some of the more prominent Founding Fathers were anti-clerical and vocal about their opposition to organized religion, say, like,  Thomas Jefferson and Benjamin Franklin.

In regards to the formation of government, Jefferson said:
“Millions of innocent men, women, and children, since the introduction of Christianity, have been burnt, tortured, fined, imprisoned; yet we have not advanced one inch towards uniformity. What has been the effect of coercion? To make one half the world fools, and the other half hypocrites.”

You can’t claim that this country was founded on religion and faith.
Most of the reason people came to this country was to escape religious persecution from the Church of England, so why would they immediately set up a system of government that allows for the very thing they were trying to escape?

>  “ These words [“under God”] will remind Americans that despite our great
> physical strength we must remain humble. They will help us to keep
> constantly in our minds and hearts the spiritual and moral principles which
> alone give dignity to man, and upon which our way of life is founded.

Eisenhower wrote that the afternoon after hearing that exact phrase, word-for-word, in a church sermon.  Don’t try to pass off his writing as his thought–that’s one of the very things that was wrong with that entire situation–Eisenhower wasn’t able to keep his personal views out of government.

> By law no one is forced into saying the Pledge of Allegiance, those that
> object to saying “under God” can chose not to recite this promise of loyalty
> to our Country.

Oh, that’s just funny, in that you’ve just proven my point.
So, you’re saying that if someone objects to saying “under god”, that they shouldn’t recite the pledge of allegiance?
I guess that precludes anyone other than christians from becoming new citizens then, doesn’t it?
Yay!!  Government sponsored monotheism!!  Yay!

> If you think that this is a conflict to the first amendment, perhaps we
> should change our motto of “In God We Trust” to “We doom our own eternal
> future because of our lack of faith, so we can doom our county too”

That’s a little dramatic, but I wouldn’t mind “In our acceptance we trust”, “In logic we trust” or “In our intelligence we trust”

> As far as Sarah Palin, I reserve my opinion, but for others this is huge
> Republican country here in Central Florida.

Oh, she’s pretty.  She winks at the camera a lot.  That doesn’t make her a good representative of the people. She’s an idiot, has no idea what’s going on within her own state, and generally clueless about the bigger, longer term picture. Her viewpoints on the age of the planet are in direct contradiction to her oh-so-precious drill-baby-drill mantra.  (unless she’s another abiogenic oil crackpot, but I don’t think she’s that smart, based on my interactions with her) But, think what you’d like about her.   Just remember that she couldn’t name a single newspaper that she reads.

If your huge Republican country there in Central Florida wants to embrace this, more power to you.  Or more something to you, anyway.

kw

And yes, that’s a beer.  The hair’s going to Locks of Love so they can make wigs for cancer patients.  I’ve been growing my hair since 2005.  I had a choice:  I was either going to do dreadlocks or cut it off and help some little kid.

I think I chose well.

I think I’ve pretty much written myself out of any inheritance from any member of my family.

———- Forwarded message ———-
From: Ken Woods
Date: Wed, Apr 22, 2009 at 7:04 PM
Subject: Re: FW: If you were born in 1930-1979…
To: Barbara Herman
Cc: aija.baltz@ahoo.com, browneyedbrunette2@erizon.net, Brian.Sabin@nitysystems.biz, Carol.olds@erizon.net, csabin23430@mail.com, dansabin@mithfield.com, vze3qw7w@erizon.net, gary.herman@mbarqmail.com, rockny@al.com, helena813@mbarqmail.com, woodyandjane1@mbarqmail.com,  jd0658@otmail.com, Danarmdel@etscape.net, joycemagic@mbarqmail.com, jlynn@heshelts.com, kaitlyn@heshelts.com,  ayb32162@ahoo.com, kitch428@sn.com, ringing@hevillages.net, mbaug13250@ol.com, kenkenandpam@mbarqmail.com, Pookish2@ol.com, raymondwoods@mbarqmail.com, shyrlburt@omcast.net, stephanie_sabin@ahoo.com, cutetes39@ahoo.com, tksjes@hevillages.net

On Wed, Apr 22, 2009 at 4:15 PM, Barbara Herman <barb.herman@mbarqmail.com> wrote:

> The quote of the month is by Jay Leno:

> ‘With hurricanes, tornados, fires out of control, mud slides, flooding,

> severe thunderstorms tearing up the country from one end to another,

> and with the threat of bird flu and terrorist attacks, are we sure this is a

> good time to take God out of the Pledge of Allegiance?’

My response was:

If you’re one of those crazy right-wing, bible thumping, brainwashed-by-Rush-Limbaugh people who thinks the planet is 6000 years old, be forewarned that you’re probably not going to agree with what I have to say.  Regardless, it’s my opinion.

With that warning, the phrase “under god” should be removed from the pledge. Essentially it says that Americans who don’t believe in the christian “god” should be excluded, not offered the same rights, and/or deported. As they can’t _truthfully_ recite the pledge of allegiance, they’re therefore not true citizens of this country.

In 1954 (at the height of the McCarthy era) the phrase “under god” was added to the pledge as a result of significant pressure from the pastor of President Eisenhower, as well as the Knights of Columbus (which is essentially a catholic old-boys-club).  The intent was to reflect what was described as the “….definitive factor in the American spirit and way of life…”[1]  and to justify and/or prove that by reciting the pledge, not only did people love the country, but also loved “god” and thereby provided some manner of separation from the “evil” communists. In his sermon, Rev. Docherty, in a blatant disregard for the separation of church and state, said:  “…….apart from the mention of the phrase, ‘the United States of America,’ it could be the pledge of any republic. In fact, I could hear little Muscovites repeat a similar pledge to their hammer-and-sickle flag in Moscow…”[1]

However, adding the phrase “under god” to the pledge was wholly unconstitutional, as it implies a de facto endorsement of monotheism –which is in direct conflict with the First Amendment. The US Supreme Court has since ruled (several times) that “…government should not prefer one religion to another, or religion to irreligion…”[2]  In 2002, the 9th Circuit Court of Appeals in California ruled that the Pledge of Allegiance wording specified by the 1954 modification constituted a government endorsement of religion and was not neutral with respect to religion, as dictated by the First Amendment.

One cannot pick and choose what parts of the First Amendment are valid.  Specifically, one cannot say that we enjoy the right to free speech, but then ignore the establishment clause as related to the free exercise of religion.  Either we have a federally mandated religion and no freedom of speech, or we don’t have any endorsed religions and have free speech.  It’s white or black.  When dealing with constitutional law, there cannot be a gray area.

It simply does not matter that the majority of Americans are christian. Despite common belief, the United States is not a democracy–it’s a federal constitutional republic–in which the Constitution provides the basis for law, not democratic choice. As such, it doesn’t matter that the majority of Americans are christian. This is a discussion of fundamental constitutional rights and it doesn’t matter what the majority wants.  The Constitution can’t be bent to fit the needs of the majority while ignoring the needs of the minority.

So I ask this:  Is the US so incredibly narrow-minded, so stuck in the “US versus Them” mentality, so blinded by so-called-american exceptionalism,  so egocentric, and so incredibly xenophobic as to continue the need to believe that the Judeo-Christian view is the “….definitive factor in the American spirit and way of life…” ?

I invite your comments and/or questions.

And yes, for those of you wondering, most of us here in Alaska recognize how much of a dipshit the weathergirl-turned-governor Sarah Palin is.

Ken

[1] As printed in the congressional record.
[2]512 U.S. 687(1994) cited subsequently.

I was just out for a ride.  Nothing really all that exciting, just a recovery ride after doing four, four minute intervals (at 250watts each) yesterday.

The plan was to ride to Tom & Melissa’s to drop off a DVD I’d burned for Tom.

Bike, check.
Chain lubed, check.
Helmet, check.
iPhone……check.

So, off I go.  First climb, I’m feeling great.  Soreness from the intervals is draining out, and I’m feeling a little spunky.  It’s about 38*F, the roads are pretty dry, The iPhone was blaring tunes, and I’m out there just enjoying being on the bike.  Really just in a great mood.

Midway through this ride there’s a decent climb that has a couple of steps in it.  It’s a good climb, and over the years, I’ve come to really enjoy riding it. (Isberg toward Chena Ridge, for those of you from ‘banks.)

At the bottom of this hill, I pull out the phone, and put on my favorite “climbing” song.  Decent beat, I know all the words, and it’s just a fun song.

So I’m about three and a half minutes into the song, and I look 50ish yards in front of me, and (finally) notice a woman standing there. Mid30’s, fairly attractive, looking at me like I’m fucking nuts.  Now, keep in mind she’s heard me singing for probably the last minute or so.  I don’t sing.  I sound like a wounded wombat when I try to carry a tune.

So, at this point, I stop singing.

I look at her. (40 yards)
She looks at me, like I’m totally off my fucking rocker. (30 yards)
At this point, I decide that the damage is done, so when the next chorus comes up, I vow to keep singing. (20 yards)

So, about 15 yards out…..

“……..You are (breath) dancing queen, (breath) and sweet, only seventeen….”

Then I come even with her driveway.  I’m less than 10 feet from this chick…….
…………..and she starts to dance.  Now, I’m not just talking a little hip sway and toe tap.
This chick pulled out The Carlton.

“Dancing queen, (breath) the beat from (breath) ‘bourine….”

Yup. That’s right.  ABBA.  Yeah.  Seriously.
Dancing Queen.  It’s a techno remix, but still.  It’s ABBA.  And this chick never knew that it was a remix.

I saw her at 3:30ish.  I passed her at roughtly 3:55…..

I couldn’t hear her, but I’m sure she heard me laughing my ass off.
Perfect ride, I say.